Wednesday, 8 June 2011

If I’m A Banker He’s A Fucking Wanker ['Geordie Shore', Episode 3] |Barbievision


The Shores

After chebalicious Holly’s exit this week, Geordie Shore is down to seven “characters”, but in Barbie’s mind it’s down to four. Sorry Sophie, James and… what was its name again? If you want to get noticed in the Tyne, you’ve got to be tashin’ on, gettin’ off and walkin’ like John Wayne…


Char

Enter Charlotte! The unexpected star of the Shore, everyone thinks Char’s in love with Gaz… NU-UH! She may like getting pumped by the parsnip, but it’s definitely Gary who needs to watch his heart. Claiming Charlotte’s just his “banker”, as in the girl you call if you haven’t pulled anyone else, Gaz thinks he’s got the upper hand but he ain’t fooling me. Charlotte’s mission to bring someone back to the shag pad is going to be interesting, cause Gaz may have got a barmaid’s number, but lets face it pet so did half the Tyne. Boy got it BAD. This Shakespearean tragedy is gonna be less Romeo and Juliet and more Macbeth if Gaz isn’t careful… he’s clearly already lost his head.


Gaz

As for Vicky and Jay, JUST ADMIT YOU FUCKING LOVE EACH OTHER, REET?! They may have only met five days ago, but this pair have had more angst than Seth and Summer, Ross and Rachel and Dawson and Joey put together. She’s already met the parents, they’ve been out for scran, they spoon every night… it’s a love story for the Twitter generation.


Vicky

I do have one issue with this week’s episode and it’s regarding the lovely Vicky. Clearly the hottest of the Geordie dolls, I’ve always found her man twang amusing, but what the heck was going on with her elocution this week?! She continued to do it like a dude while rocking her beloved basketball vest but once she was all dolled up she started to sound like Nadine Coyle after a week in LA. Maybe she heard about Chezza’s American nightmare and thought she ought to learn to enunciate. Vicky love, you’ll never keep it up. Just wait ‘til Jay starts tashin’ on with a random and the Geordie will be rippin’ right oot ye!


Wayaye!

‘Til next time Wasps… remember you canny be fancying him!



Love Barbie x




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