Ciao bambole! I hope we’re all holding up after the past three weeks of fashion madness - one more to go and then you can perhaps consider wearing flats for a day or two… if your style conscious will let you that is.
So this week was all about those sexy Italian stallions, specifically Signores Armani and Cavalli. In a spat straight out of Mean Girls, drama erupted between the two heavyweights after Roberto complained about being the last big designer to show at MFW. Uneducated dolls might think that a finale position is surely the most prestigious of all: for a model, si, but for an entire show it’s practically fashion suicide. Unless the fash pack suspect that you have one big ass trick up your sleeve, they’ll have hot footed it on to Paris the night before, leaving your F-Row empty, or, God forbid, filled with the international Z-list.
So how did tanorexic Giorgio end up embroiled in such drama? Well, the ever outspoken RC couldn’t resist a pop at “the little king”, saying how he had gotten his way as usual, being allowed to move up the calendar to avoid such a spot. Armani responded with a threat, that Cavalli “shouldn’t upset ‘the little king’”. Why not we wonder dolls? I suspect he probably has a sack full of dirt on the infamous lothario, and is just waiting to unleash it at any moment… keep pushing Roberto! I’ll still love you no matter what baby!
With this fash fight firmly atop my Milano highlights, I thought I’d go down a different route this week, and keep the fight alight! So, forgetting the bitching, who wins in the battle of the S/S collections?
ROUND ONE: EMPORIO ARMANI
DING DING DING!
Armani’s youthful Emporio line was, well, typically Armani. Elegant with clean lines, soft feminine tailoring and subtle patterns. The colour palette? Mushroom, oyster and metallic. Despite its wearability and a few playsuits that I could totally rock, the Emporio Armani collection left me feeling a little… empty. And not the good I-haven’t-eaten-for-a-week empty either, more like I-haven’t-had-sex-in-a-month empty. And that, dear dolls, is never good.
Score: An uninspiring 3/10
ROUND TWO: JUST CAVALLI
DING DING DING!
I have a special place in my heart for the Just Cavalli line and this season it was, once again, right up my alley. Having successfully distanced herself from Cavalli’s mainline collection over the past year or so, the Just Cavalli girl is young, beautiful and bang on trend… in short, she’s me. Or I’m her. Whichever way you want to look at it, the ethereal fabrics, floral adorned leopard prints and subtle nod to the aquatics put Emporio Armani in the shade. The black mullet dress was a favourite of mine, as was the all-over sequined sweater, but it was the neon trimmed segment of the show which really set my heart alight- particularly Cara Delevigne in her micro mini. Legs ahoy!
Score: An oh-so-fabulous 8/10
ROUND THREE: GIORGIO ARMANI
DING DING DING!
Giorgio’s disappointing start to the week was more than amended in his mainline show. The theme: Kaleidoscope. The look: masculine meets feminine in fluid silk and sequined trouser suits with patent brogues. The vibe: a 1920s Charleston girl thrown into a starry night in 2012. Cosmic prints and layers of sheer billowing fabric added to the magical vibe, while the small retro hats perched atop the models heads kept the roaring ‘20s alive. A definite comeback if ever I saw one!
Score: A star reaching 9/10
ROUND FOUR: ROBERTO CAVALLI
DING DING DING!
Leopard and snake prints are standard at any Roberto Cavalli show: one look at his decadent Milano restaurant shows that these are very much his favourite inspirations. However, this was not your standard Roberto Cavalli show. Beginning with in a new direction with an all-white palette, extreme laser cut tailoring was the order of the day, with bolder baroque prints in shades of lemon, lime and apricot following. The leopard and snake slithered on to the catwalk later, adorning the designer’s signature sheer maxi dresses and F-me slips. Black leather panels added a glam goth vibe continuing on from last season, and cut-out frocks meant there was plenty of skin on show. Cavalli’s love of the female form is obvious, but he definitely reined his urges in this season, to produce a somewhat classier collection. Did I appreciate the horndog’s restraint? Undecided.
Score: A halfway there 5/10… No Bon Jovi pun intended!
THE VERDICT: Ding dong the little king is dead… well, not quite. Congratulations Cavalli, you won by a whisker! Which just goes to show, it’s not about where you sit in the schedule, but how much you appeal to this blonde’s slutty side. Bravo Roberto!
Til next time dolls… Think gay, think Paris!